Friday, September 22, 2006

Unsolicited but Useful Advise Concerning Housekeeping

1. If your mother is coming to visit on Friday, and you say this sentence out loud:
"Well, I was thinking of holding off on that until Thursday so I don't have to do it twice."
think about what can happen when one makes statements of intent outloud.

2. If you open a package of chicken that still has several days before the Sell Before Date, but ask your husband "Does this smell okay to you?" don't listen to him Trust yourself. He eats things like yogurt and bananas and liverwurst.

3. When you wake up at 5:00am the next morning queasy and unable to hold your head up properly, wake up your husband. If he feels poorly too, lay back down and seethe. See #2.

4. If you do have to stay home with your husband and both of you are sick don't try to do it together. It's not romantic, despite what he tries to tell you.

5. If your husband has the ability to come home for lunch, don't clean while he's home. Seriously. Because when you have to grunt and moan to move the sherman tank that is the coffee table, he'll make comments like "take it easy!", while he continues to read and eat lunch. Romance, again!

Thursday, September 14, 2006

Things I Like Very Much, For the Obvious Reasons

I like parrots, but it seems like an awfully big commitment, or something potentially mean to do to your children. They are practically immortal.
If you go to Busch Gardens in Tampa early in the morning, this totally happens, which made me want to get a job there. My business card would say Flamingo Walker. What an excellent job. Posted by Picasa

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Things I Hate and am Perfectly Entitled To; Part 2

Honestly, there aren't that many things I hate. But my cat does this at least 3 times a day. And no, it's not about the dish because I've gotten ones with the approximate diameter of trash can lids so it's not a whisker thing so don't email me suggestions of the like. He will only eat of the floor. Speaking of garbage cans, don't you think it's interesting that the universally accepted symbol for a trash recepticle is still a silver can with a lid, ala Oscar the Grounch, even though no one uses them any more and would bet my kids have never even seen one like that?
These are the things I think about now that I am working from home. Don't you wish you were married to me so I could talk to you about metal garbage cans and what the cat did when you were at work? I thought so. Posted by Picasa

Monday, September 11, 2006

Things I Hate, and am Perfectly Entitled To. (first in a series)

Every. Single. Day. Usually in the corners of rooms, which is less upsetting and somewhat considerate of them to be honest. You should hear the sound they make when being sucked into the tube of the vaccum. Posted by Picasa