Saturday, December 03, 2005

My First Day Without a Uterus

Things I learned on my first day without a utereus:
1. If your roommate watches country music television all night they may be inclined to watch game shows all day.
2. The exception to this is when they watch "Bonanza", and when they put on thier bathrobe and drag thier IV downstairs to smoke. Also when they sneak candies while on an all clear liquid diet, begin vomiting and having diarrhea. Then one can turn off the television for a while.
3. Any night shift nurse that replies to a nurse call button at 1am by bursting in and saying "what is the problem?" should be held in leery regard.
4. One should follow all of the rules of walking around and pooping and breathing into the incentive venilator because it is much much better to recover from this in the comfort of one's own home. And that oral percoset is better than iv morphine.
5. I am a spoiled spoiled princess. Thank you for all of the floral love!

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